Managing Holidays After Separation
A Practical guide for working parents in nsw
School holidays bring excitement for kids but for separated working parents in NSW, they can also mean stress, negotiation, and a serious scheduling puzzle. Between full-time jobs, limited annual leave, and parenting across two households, holidays can quickly become overwhelming without a clear plan.
This guide offers practical tips for separated or divorced parents in New South Wales to manage school breaks confidently and with minimal conflict while keeping their child’s wellbeing at the centre.
Why School Holidays Are So Tricky for Working Parents
NSW children typically have around 12 weeks of school holidays each year, including term breaks and the summer holiday period. But most working parents only receive 4 weeks of annual leave.
That leaves around 8 weeks per year where alternative care needs to be arranged, something that can be even more difficult when parents are separated and navigating shared care.
What Happens During the Holidays After Separation?
If you’re separated and parenting under a Parenting Plan or Parenting Orders, these may already outline how school holiday time is shared. But if your arrangements are informal or vague, confusion and conflict can easily arise, especially over long breaks.
While a 50/50 split is common, the best arrangements are the ones that genuinely work for your child.
Practical Tips for Co-Parenting School Holidays in NSW
When it comes to school holiday arrangements, there’s no one-size-fits-all solution. The right schedule is one that suits the individual needs of the children, not just what seems fair on paper.
1. Be flexible. Make arrangements that suit the child
While many families choose to split school holidays equally, such as giving each parent “half”, that’s not the only option, and it’s not always what’s best for the child.
For some children, especially if they’re very young or experience separation anxiety, a three-week block away from one parent might feel overwhelming. In these cases, something like a week-about schedule might work better.
On the other hand, where one parent lives far away, it may make sense for them to spend extended time during the summer holidays or school breaks, and less during the school term. The arrangements can (and should) reflect what works best for the children involved.
2. Be specific. Vague orders can lead to conflict.
When creating Parenting Plans or Parenting Orders, it’s crucial to think about the exact wording around holiday time.
For example, an order that simply says “Dad gets half the school holidays and Mum gets half” may sound reasonable, but it can quickly lead to confusion and disagreement.
Some questions that can cause friction can include:
- Does the holiday start on the last day of school, or the first official day of the break?
- Where exactly is the “halfway point” in the holiday period?
- Should the child return a day or two before school starts again to get organised for the new term?
- If flights are involved, who is responsible for booking and paying for them?
- Have both parents checked the airline policies for unaccompanied minors?
A well-worded agreement helps avoid last-minute arguments and sets clear expectations for both parents.
3. Start conversations early
If you know that school holiday arrangements might be tricky to negotiate, it’s best to start discussions well ahead of time. Don’t wait until the week before the break. Early conversations give both parents time to plan around work, organise travel or childcare, and avoid uneccessary stress.
When You're Not Spending the Holidays With Your Kids
It’s perfectly normal to feel sadness, guilt, or even a sense of loss when your child is spending a holiday period with their other parent.
Some ways to stay connected and take care of yourself:
- Video call check-ins, if appropriate and agreed upon
- Send messages or photos, even small updates help kids feel close
- Plan something meaningful for yourself. A mini trip, time with friends, or just rest
- Create new traditions like a welcome-back dinner or shared scrapbook
Remember, your presence in your child’s life isn’t measured by the number of days but by the consistency, love, and support you offer.
A Little Planning Goes a Long Way
Managing school holidays as a separate working parent in NSW can be challenging but it’s manageable. With early communication, flexible thinking, and a clear focus on your child’s wellbeing, the holidays don’t need to be a source of stress.
The key is to plan ahead, be specific, and always keep your child’s needs front and centre. Wjhether you’re coparenting across suburbs or states, support is available and you don’t have to figure it out on your own.
Need Help With Holiday Parenting Arrangements in NSW?
We support separated parents across regional NSW to create practical, child-focused Parenting Plans, including school holiday arrangements. Whether you’re starting from scratch or updating existing Orders, we’re here to help. Get expert legal support today by reaching out to us at admin@allwrightbourke.com.au or give us a call at 1300 225 297 (1300 ABL AWS).